Usually I don’t write stories for blogs. But lately I have felt that the best way I can explain my feelings (and perhaps the resulting actions) is to express it through an imaginative story. It’s a (very) short story, consisting of only one scene, but it seems to covey an entire array of thoughts I have had. And if you will allow me, I will place you right in the middle of it…

The Cast:
The Boss — You
The Workers — Your Brain
Lil’ Problem — The World/Issues/Circumstances/Life
Mr. Anxiety — well…Anxiety

Step into the scene with me…

You have a nice little office, filled with desks organized and neat little rows. At each of the desks, sits one of your workers, each holding a composed look on their face. All your workers are busy typing away, getting work done and moving efficiently. Everything is in order. The air is calm. Work is getting done. Output is being produced. You don’t stop to admire this amazing efficiency because it is as it should be.

Just outside the office doors sits a receptionist. Her job is to take inquiries and assist the Issues that come by with whatever they need. She has successfully helped a number of Issues and has sent them happily on their way with disturbing the tranquility of your office. Again, this is not worthy of admiration, because this is as it should be.

One day, Lil’ Problem walks in just a naturally as any of the other Issues before him. He strolls up to the counter and states his needs. As she has been accustomed to in the past, the receptionist begins to look for a solution among her many files. Both she and Lil’ Problem remain composed at she searches. While she is working, up walks Mr. Anxiety. Now, Mr. Anxiety is a rather large and imposing lawyer, the best in the business. He gets what he wants for his client at all costs. In a matter of seconds he manages to convince Lil’ Problem to let him take on his case. And before the receptionist has a chance to locate her solution, Mr. Anxiety has dragged Lil’ Problem up to the doors of your office.

As he is obviously been accustomed to doing, Mr. Anxiety bursts through the office doors, yelling and screaming at the top of his lungs. With every breath he asserts that Lil’ Problem‘s situation was bigger than it seemed and in need of immediate attention from everyone. He rapidly moves about the room, flipping tables, punching walls, and scattering the once organized papers all over. The scene quickly becomes a mess. At this point, all your workers can do is stand aside in fear, hoping for it to end soon. Shocked by the sudden appearance of Mr. Anxiety, you are frozen at the front of the room, unable to produce a coherent sentence. He continues to badger you with questions and insults until you are left shaking on the floor. Your workers respond with similar actions.

Suddenly this well-oiled machine is at a broken standstill. As if intending to add to the madness, the phones begin to ring incessantly. Usually the workers are quick to answer, not allowing a single call to reach the second ring. But the current situation has reduced them to statues on the walls. Customers, friends, and loved ones all begin to worry about not being able to reach your workers. But the workers continue to shrink under the pressure of Mr. Anxiety and the now deafening sounds of the ringing phones. The office is in total chaos.

Only after some time has passed, and Mr. Anxiety has finally settled, and the workers have recovered, do you all begin to reset the tables, repair the walls and reorganize the files. Only then are you able to answer the phones and explain the situation. And only then are you able to solve the issue with Lil’ Problem.

And you’re probably wondering why Lil’ Problem didn’t seek to solve his issue the easy way. Why didn’t he just wait for the receptionist to get him that solution? Why did he let Mr. Anxiety take over? And if you sat down and asked everyone in that room these questions, they would all respond with the same answer. The boss, the workers, the receptionist, Lil’ Problem, and even Mr. Anxiety himself would all say one thing: they don’t know; they were simply acting as they ordinarily do.

This story reflects what it is like inside my mind sometimes. As someone who has experienced both the daily anxieties of life and the overwhelming destruction of actual anxiety attacks, I hope that this story helps you better understand what it’s like to be the person experiencing the anxiety. It’s absolute chaos.

And if I could ask just one thing of you with this is sight, it would be this: Please, if you encounter someone in the midst of an anxiety attack or mental meltdown or whatever you want to call it, please give them time to recover. That’s all I ask. Rather than shooting out questions and trying to pry the issues out of them, give them a chance to reel themselves back in. For me a least, one of the most stressful parts of an anxiety attack is being forced to talk about while it’s still happening. Please don’t make me answer your call while Mr. Anxiety still has me in a choke-hold.

K.J. 01/28/2017